Train up a Child…
1. Practice Using Kind Words - “Please” and “Thank you” have always been the magic words and they still are. Help make these words part of your child’s vocabulary by making it part of yours and then practicing together. Use these words at home rather than just a novelty thing when you are out and about. Kind words should be a part of your everyday speech.
2. Greetings - As soon as your child is old enough to understand, begin teaching them to greet people by name. Teach them to look others in the eye (not at the ground) and say “Hello” clearly. Also children are never too young to learn to shake hands as well (always the right hand and give a simple firm shake). Remember it is much more respectful for a child (until they’re 18) to use a title when addressing all adults as Aunt Alice or Mrs. Jones, or Dr. Smith.
If you are chatting with another adult, teach your child to wait for a break in the conversation before interrupting. Just budding in with an “Excuse Me” and expecting that to be the magic word to stop all conversation is incorrect. Having your child wait patiently for a break in the conversation will teach them patience… which is a virtue.
3. Out and About – With small children make sure before you leave the house they are well fed and rested to avoid crankiness. Set boundaries and guidelines for expected behavior and create consequences for bad behavior. Make sure you follow through with the consequences or you’ll just be blowing out hot air and your child will not take you serious.
In addition, be sure to teach them that good manners are used EVERYWHERE not just at home or at Grandma’s house. Make good manners a habit at home so they will use them everywhere.
4. Telephone Manners – Early on your child’s first telephone experience will more than likely be just saying “Hello” to a relative or close friend. As they get older teach them to answer the telephone politely, speak clearly, ask the caller to “hold on one moment please” and not screaming their head off to let you know you’ve got a call. Later on taking proper messages and not dominating the telephone will become essential.
5. Table Manners – Practice at home. Have your child set the table (boys and girls) this is how I got my very first start. Then be sure the entire family sits down to dinner together. •Napkin goes on the lap. •Help your child to properly use the utensils. •Keep elbows off the table (except in between courses). •Pass food around the table to the right. •Take small bites, chew with their mouth closed, and DON’T talk with food in their mouth. •Include your child in dinner conversation and keep it positive and fun.
6. Thank You Notes – Teach your child to write thank you notes (a must for holiday gifts) and help them to do so. However, it is not necessary to write a thank you note if the gift giver is present while the gift is being opened. Just be sure your child thanks them personally when they open the gift. Otherwise you can make note writing a family project. With smaller children they can draw a picture or scribble their thank you on a card and older children may need your help when addressing the envelopes etc.
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